PLEASE DO NOT USE THIS PHOTO ELSEWHERE. Hihi.
February 20, 2014
A few days back, I was thinking about what age I would want to have my first child.
I was thinking around 28 years old.
I’m currently 20.
Before, I really wanted three children.
But then because I really really want to give my children enough attention and a quality life, I was thinking of having just one or two at most.
I want my first child to be a girl.
Because as a woman, I think I can understand her better.
And since I am a new mom, that would be advantageous than having a son as the first child.
I also want to dress her up!
But then again..
Having a daughter also has another side.
I think this article sums it up:
I Really Hope My Future Child Isn’t A Girl
I hope I never have a daughter.
If I did, I’d be worried sick all the time of her walking alone at night wearing skirts. I’d be sorry for all her hormone-related woes – her sadness, her fears, her body image trouble, her fertility, the purity of her body and her mind and her soul. I’d be helpless in securing her future happiness, because it doesn’t lie so much in her own career path or intellect as much as it does in her meeting and being with a decent guy who would never hurt her.
What am I going to do if she turns out to be below-average in her looks? How can I lie to her face every day, this person that is partially me, and tell her that no, looks don’t matter, that inner beauty does, and she’s beautiful on the INSIDE and that’s all that matters?
What am I going to do when she’s going through puberty, and asks me why suddenly all the boys are starting to pay more attention to her? Do I dare tell her the truth about what men want? That the older she gets the less she should learn to trust them? That at first glance she’s more often than not just a piece of meat out for grabs?
What am I going to do when she goes to college, and goes to parties and gets drunk, and hot-blooded males start to make sexual advances toward her and she can’t tell the fine difference between the Polite No and the Tentative Yes?
What am I going to do when she goes to work, and meets men who are more senior in the firm, who have families but like what they see (God forbid this must mean she’s not butt ugly)? How can I teach her to walk the thin line between the use and abuse of her female power to climb the corporate ladder?
What am I going to do when she’s trying to settle down, and her biological clock is ticking, but she thinks it’s a sin to believe that because feminism has taught her that it’s important to be independent and successful, ON HER OWN, so that she doesn’t “need” to “belong” to anybody? And never truly will?
What am I going to do when she has children, when she’s pressured by a male-dominated society to go back to work after merely a couple weeks of maternity leave, and leaves her child in the care of a total stranger? How will her child possibly bond with her, know her, love her?
I hope she doesn’t have a daughter, either.
I hope I have a son. Because then he can work as hard as he likes, eat as badly as he wants, and sleep as little as he needs—looks and youthfulness matter less to him than money and social status. Because then he can bang as many women as he likes, because that would make him a rock star among his peers and win him respect. Because he can be single for all his life and still have a blast and die happy. Because he can run shirtless down a street and wouldn’t end up with child as a victim of sexual violence or just shit outta luck. Because he doesn’t need to lean in anywhere. Because he wasn’t made from some asshole’s ribs.
-END OF ARTICLE-
After reading this..
The points really struck me.
I am now re-considering wanting to have a daughter!
But seriously though..
No matter what gender my first baby will be, I can never be less than ecstatic when he or she’s born. 🙂
How about you?
I guess you can tell by the title what this post will be about.
And yes, it is not misleading.
It is about family.
About my family in this case.
As a family, I can say that we are close when we are together and a little not-so-close when not.
I don’t mean literally okay!
It is just that when we’re together, we converse well but we don’t spend so much time with each other as we do before so we have less bonding moments now.
Usually when we get home, we go to our individual rooms and just go out again when it’s time to eat.
Sometimes we eat together at our veranda, sometimes we eat inside our rooms.
I know, I know….
A family should eat together but I don’t know how it started but we don’t eat at our dining table anymore.
When we are at the veranda, we use the foldable tables and monoblock chairs.
It has been like that for a long time now.
I woke up to a text this
Mom said that we should make house rules.
Rules for eating, bonding and the like.
My sister and I liked the idea.
Not only will it bring back the family time we used to have but it will impose discipline as well.
We plan to write down rules like eating together, 10PM curfew everyday unless you have a valid reason and things like family movie hours, studying time for the kids and also, a time for yourself.
I shall show you a brief outline on our house rules when they’re done.
How about you?
Do you have house rules too?
It was a last minute plan when my sister and I decided to come with my eldest sister and her family to Batangas.
It was really not just a simple getaway.
The real reason why we went there is because we were going to attend the wake and burial of my eldest sister’s husband’s father.
We call him “Tatay” which also means father/dad.
Yes, we are not blood related but we still call him tatay.
Aside from him being like a father to all, as an individual, he is genuinely kind..not only to the people he knows well but also to random people and the people he just met.
His kindness and intelligence has long been an inspiration to many and because of that, I’m pretty sure that he will never be forgotten.
He has made his mark into people’s hearts.
It was almost around 9 in the evening when my eldest sister’s family fetched us at home.
Our mom had sandwiches and other snacks packed for our 3-hour trip to Lobo, Batangas.
During the whole trip, everyone got their little dose of sleep.
I kept talking to my brother in law who is driving because I know he’s tired and really lacked sleep these past few days.
He actually said that he only had 3 hours of sleep in 2 days!
As we arrived at the wake, I realized that it was a familiar place.
Then it hit me.
It was beside their house which I have visited before.
I’m not sure if it was here already when I last visited this place around 5 years ago.
It was a small chapel.
They had it built inside their very spacious lot which houses a lot of homes – homes of their relatives.
Stories were exchanged and while we were there.
Then we decided to play cards.
It has been a habit and somewhat like a tradition here in the Philippines that when there is a wake, there are really groups of people who play cards or Mahjong.
They don’t necessarily gamble but usually, the elders do.
In Tatay’s wake, it was a bit different.
Though the elders were playing Mahjong, I didn’t really see if there was money involved.
On the other table were a little younger set compared to the elders who were playing cards.
Beside them were benches who were sat on by teens and some of their parents.
I’m not sure what they were playing but their punishment was to have something written on their face by the use of coal!
They were really having fun while playing.
I don’t know what is in the wakes I go to but usually, when I go to a distant relative or a relative’s wake, the people there are usually not the silent types.
Yes, they mourn but they won’t let it stop them from being happy.
We have this way of thinking that the deceased person would want his/her burial to be happy and not see his/her loved ones sad.
My table on the other hand is composed of both my sisters and my sister’s boyfriend.
At first, we were really just playing with no bets.
That was before we thought of a great plan.
We got the snacks that we brought for the trip and got a few and divided it equally among us.
You got that right!
We used food as our bets.
To cut the chase, I ended up with the most food.
But I didn’t eat everything since I was so full.
At around 4 AM (yes, we didn’t sleep till that time), we decided to walk to the beach since we planned to sleep there.
The walk lasted for around 7 minutes because it was dark so we slowly walked.
When we reached the beach, it was cold but warm at the same time.
I don’t know how to explain it but the wind felt nice.
We brought our own sheets and spread it out above the sand.
The nephews of my brother in law got some wood and made a bonfire.
It was a fun experience!!
P.S Sleeping by the beach is on my bucket list… and now, I can tick it off :>
Also, having a bonfire is on my list..another one I can tick of!
You can see my not-so-finished bucket list here.
That is it for now.
Today, I was supposed to pay my tuition fee at school then meet my cousin-K but since there was a change of plans, I ended up going straight to the mall.
As I waited for my cousin-K, Sami, the cousin of my cousin-B (another cousin) called me and said cousin-K invited her to join us for the day.
I waited for the both of them at the mall since I was unexpectedly early.
The first thing I did was go to National Bookstore.
I checked out some books and got some titles so that I can check them at the book sale since I really don’t have that much extra budget for books.
Searching for ebooks of those books were an option too!!
While I was on my way to the Book Sale store..
I was about to pass Bag Tag when I decided to stop.
Aside from my (travel) luggage having no form of identification, I think it is also a traveler (in the future) must-have!
I looked at their designs and had one made!
Here it is!
I have decided to get a cartoon design because I want my travels to be fun like it.
Though I already have one right now, I still want to purchase another one.
You’ll never know when you’ll be needing two or more pieces of luggage!
Think long-term travelling 🙂
Just after my bag tag was finished, my cousin came and met me at the stall.
We then went to Coffee Bean Tea & Leaf and chatted till the cousin of our cousin came.
When the cousin of our cousin came, we ordered our beverages, a slice of cake and my ever favorite Eggs Benedict!
I can vouch for their EggsBen!!
IT IS SOOOOOOO DELICIOUS!!!
After hours there, we went to Burger King and had fries and Hi-C.
We, again, chatted and chatted and took pictures to brag to our cousins^^
After which, we went to Smart Center to apply for a postpaid plan and met my sister there as well.
The cousin of our cousin needed to go home at around 8:30.
When she left, my sister, cousin and I went to the food court.
Aside from the usual chatting, we actually talked about travelling and guys!
We are planning a weekend getaway with our close cousins.
It is still not final but we are hoping it’ll push through.
Then we realized after all the planning that the three of us are really frustrated travellers – as of the moment.
There is something about travelling that we are hungry for.
And that we can cross mountains just for it.
Aside from the weekend getaway, we are eyeing to go to Coron in Palawan or even around South East Asia.
Thailand is the first one on our list!
How about you?
If given a chance, where would you wanna go next?
This post is – again – related to my birthday.
How my day went and everything in between.
My day started while I was still making gum paste roses.
Meaning I slept late..around 4:30 in the morning.
That is because I helped my sister finish her wedding cake order for the same day as my birthday.
Below is the picture of the first two gum paste roses that I made from scratch!!
I woke up at around 8:30 in the morning cause we had to deliver the cake and do some minor adjustments at the venue itself.
And this is the final product – the wedding cake that was delivered..
After that, we went to Divisoria, a wholesale market nearby.
We then shopped for giveaways for our post-Christmas party with my cousins (mom’s side).
Then we went to SM Mall of Asia for the game paraphernalia.
We arrived at our house around 6PM and then the party started.
Before eating, they didn’t forget to sing me a happy birthday song and everyone also greeted me.
We had a lot of games and everyone was so cooperative and everyone just had a blast!
There were some fireworks too!!!
The games made us more familiar to each other and because of it, a lot was discovered.
This party definitely made us more close and settled all the small misunderstandings that were present.
Though the party was only prepared for less than a month, it was definitely a success!!
We plan to do this every year together with our lolo papang’s birthday!
Even though he is in heaven already, he still is in our hearts and no one will ever forget him.
Because of him, our family is this close and bonded.
It was such a nice way to celebrate my birthday 🙂